So… You woke up in a rape cave.

The night started off great.

You and your friends found an amazing karaoke bar right by the ocean.

A night of great seafood, perfect weather, and several drinks from some cute guys and… a dolphin? With a mustache?

Then things get a little hazy. You remember a fin reaching around you, and the dolphin leading you down the dock, a splash, and then… darkness.


You groggily wake up to sound of waves gently slapping against rocks and echoing about in some kind of underwater cave. Your clothes are a little disheveled and you’re nursing one of the worst hangovers of your life. Rubbing your face, you turn over and see a dolphin lying next to you on the rocks.

“Oh, hey babe. You’re awake,” says the dolphin.

“Uhh… You can talk?” you reply.

“Talking is the least of my abilities… as you should know.” the dolphin replied with a wink and a nudge from his fin.

“What is that supposed to mean?”

The dolphin chuffs a bit from his blowhole, “Wow, you really did have a lot to drink last night. Listen, let’s just leave this as-is and go back to our regular lives. As much as you loved me last night, I’m not too sure I’m the type of guy you would bring home to meet the folks.”

“Well.. that would require some type of aquarium, and some apparatu- Wait.      Did we?        Me and you?          You know?”

“Like two sea horses in a bucking contest.”

“Oh… OH GOD.”



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